I Hadn’t Slept Properly in 6 Months. A Neurologist Friend Told Me to Stop Blaming Stress – and Focus on This Instead
I’m going to be honest about something I don’t usually talk about.
For the better part of six months, I averaged about three and a half hours of broken sleep a night.
Not because of a new baby or shift work or anything dramatic. I just… couldn’t switch off.
It always started the same way. I’d fall asleep fine – sometimes within minutes. But by 2 or 3am, I’d be wide awake. Heart beating a little too fast.
Mind already running through tomorrow’s problems. And the more I tried to fall back asleep, the more awake I became.
I tried melatonin. It helped for about a week, then stopped. I tried magnesium glycinate – same thing. I downloaded two different sleep apps and did the guided meditations religiously for a month.
I cut caffeine after noon, stopped screens an hour before bed, bought blackout curtains, kept the bedroom at exactly the right temperature.
Nothing stuck.
I was exhausted in a way that no amount of coffee could fix. My concentration was gone. My patience with my kids was paper-thin. I started dreading bedtime because I knew what was coming.
The conversation that changed everything
A close friend of mine is a neurologist. Over dinner one night – I probably looked as tired as I felt – she said something that stopped me mid-sentence.
“Sarah, you don’t have a sleep problem. You have a nervous system problem.“
She explained it like this: my body was stuck in what she called a “sympathetic loop.”
Fight-or-flight mode – not the dramatic, adrenaline-pumping kind, but a low-grade version that keeps your system just alert enough that deep sleep becomes almost impossible.
“Your brain knows it’s safe,” she said. “But your nervous system hasn’t got the message.”
She told me about the vagus nerve – the longest nerve in the body, running from the brain all the way down through the neck, chest, and gut. It’s essentially the switch between your body’s stress mode and its rest-and-recovery mode.
When it’s working properly, it helps you calm down naturally. When it’s not – when it’s been overridden by months or years of chronic stress – your body forgets how to wind down on its own.
I’d never heard of it. But the more I read, the more it made sense.
This wasn’t about sleep hygiene or bedtime routines. It was about a nerve that had stopped doing its job.
What vagus nerve stimulation actually is
The idea behind vagus nerve stimulation is straightforward: you send a gentle electrical signal to the vagus nerve, which tells your parasympathetic nervous system – the “rest and digest” side – to activate.
Your heart rate slows, your breathing deepens, and your body starts to shift out of that low-grade alert state.
It’s not new. Doctors have been using implanted vagus nerve stimulators to treat epilepsy and severe depression since the 1990s.
But the technology has evolved. There are now non-invasive devices that stimulate the nerve through the skin – no surgery, no prescription.
My neurologist friend mentioned a device called Pulsetto. It’s a small wearable that sits on your neck and delivers gentle electrical pulses to the vagus nerve on both sides – what’s called bilateral stimulation.
You use it with a phone app, and a typical session takes about 4 minutes.
She’d been recommending it to patients who were stuck in the same pattern I was – not clinically ill, just chronically wired.
She told me the research was promising: a 2025 study found that people who used it twice daily for four weeks reported 56% lower stress levels and 41% improved sleep quality.
I ordered one that night.
What happened in the first two weeks
I’m not going to tell you it was a miracle from night one. It wasn’t.
The first time I used Pulsetto, I felt a gentle tingling on both sides of my neck – not unpleasant, just different. Like a mild, buzzing warmth.
The app walked me through a 4-minute sleep programme before bed.
That first night, I still woke at 3am. But something was different. The racing heart wasn’t there. I felt calmer, even though I was awake.
I used the device again, did another 4-minute session in bed, and fell back asleep within about 20 minutes.
By the end of the first week, the 3am wake-ups were still happening – but less often. Maybe three nights out of seven instead of every single night. And when they did happen, the panic wasn’t there.
My body felt like it was actually capable of relaxing, rather than just pretending to.
By week two, something shifted.
I slept through the night – fully, properly, all the way to my alarm – for the first time in months.
Then it happened again the next night. And the night after that.
I actually cried in the shower on the fourth morning. Not because anything dramatic happened, but because I’d forgotten what it felt like to wake up rested.
Three months later
I’ve been using Pulsetto every night for three months now. Here’s what I can tell you.
The sleep improvement was the first thing I noticed, but it wasn’t the only thing. My general anxiety – the background hum of tension I’d carried for so long I’d stopped noticing it – started to quiet down.
I was more patient. More present. Less reactive to small stresses that used to throw me off for hours.
I’m not saying this device cured anything.
I’m saying it gave my nervous system a nudge in the right direction, and my body did the rest.
A few things worth knowing if you’re considering it: you need to apply electrode gel before each session (it comes with the device).
The gel is a little cold, but you get used to it. The device itself is comfortable enough to wear on the sofa – I usually do my session while reading before bed.
And you need to be consistent. The effects build over time. Skipping a few days and expecting instant results isn’t how this works.
Who this is for (and who it isn’t for)
I’d recommend Pulsetto if you’re someone who has tried the usual sleep advice and it hasn’t stuck.
- If you fall asleep fine but wake up in the middle of the night.
- If you feel like your body has forgotten how to relax.
- If you’re looking for something drug-free that you can use at home without scheduling appointments or committing to an hour-long routine.
It’s not for everyone. If you have a pacemaker or implanted medical device, you shouldn’t use it. If you’re pregnant, check with your doctor first. And if you’re dealing with a serious medical condition, this isn’t a replacement for professional treatment.
But if you’re where I was six months ago – exhausted, frustrated, and running out of options – it’s worth a try.
They offer a 30-day money-back guarantee, so the risk is basically zero.
I just wish someone had told me about the vagus nerve sooner.
I spent six months trying to fix my sleep when the real problem was a nerve I didn’t even know existed.